8 TIPS FOR CLOTHES SHOPPING TOGETHER THAT WON’T LEAD TO COUPLES THERAPY
You’ve already made it down the aisle, but can you make it through a day of clothes shopping as a couple? Before you say yes, really, really think about that answer. Eighty percent of men don’t like shopping with their partners and forty-five percent avoid doing so at all costs, according the Psychology Today article, “Why Men Don’t Like Shopping and (Most) Women Do.” Men also become bored after and average of twenty-six minutes of shopping, while it took women two hours to fade.
“Men are often used to shopping for classic pieces that are simple and versatile,” says popular New York City personal shopper and stylist, Valerie Halfon of Shop with Val. “Their biggest decision may be: “Do I get the dark gray shirt or the light gray?” On the other hand, women are often used to shopping for the latest trend. This contributes to a huge disconnect.”
Since we’re all about bringing people together—and keeping them together—here at Love &, we’ve come up with eight sure-fire tips (other than online shopping) that should make your next clothes shopping experience together a pleasant one.
1. Make Sure You’re On The Same Page.
“Ask your partner if they want you by their side as they shop or if they’d prefer to split up and meet afterwards,” Halfon says. The key here is honestly expressing want you want.
2. Leave The Fashion Advice To Tim Gunn.
You may think you know what’s hot and what’s not, but that doesn’t mean you need to verbalize it. “If your partner knows what they want and like, don’t push your opinion on them unless they ask for it,” Halfon says.
3. Be Supportive.
“Maybe your partner will select something you’re not a fan of,” Halfon says. “If it makes them feel attractive and confident then try to put your own feelings aside. Besides, they have to wear it, not you!”
Halfon says there’s a fine line between honesty and hurting your partner’s feelings, especially when it comes to fashion. “Not sure how to tell your partner that sweater is hideous?” Halfon says. “Redirect them towards another piece, while giving them a compliment, ‘Try this blue sweater. You would look great in it as it would bring out your eyes.’ I’m a firm believer of telling a white lie to avoid hurting someone you care about.”
5. Be Irritated with the Industry, Not the Shopper.
“Can’t figure out why your wife goes into a fitting room for two hours and walks out with nothing?” Halfon says. “Pick up an issue of Vogue, or check out who she is following on Instagram, and you’ll understand why women get overwhelmed and indecisive. The options are endless!”
6. Practice Patience.
“I think it’s great when men are patient and willing to stand outside the fitting room to let their partner know what they think and offer help in grabbing something in another size or color,” says Halfon. “Even if she takes twice as long as you.”
7. Plan A Seventh-Inning Stretch.
My friend, Kim, whose first job was working at J. Crew, swears by this strategy when shopping with her husband. “Call a timeout for a cocktail and some appetizers,” she says—especially if you’re afternoon shopping with your partner. This way you can both recharge and finish out the shopping spree on a high note.
8. Remember Why You’re Shopping Together in the First Place.
“At the end of the day, our goal is always the same,” Halfon says. “We all want to look good for our partner. Once we remember this, it becomes easier to put our differences aside, and support one another. That’s what a marriage is all about—accepting how different we may be, but knowing that those differences got you to where you are today. As long as both of you are willing to compromise there should be nothing but stylish smiles ahead!”